“For we are God’s masterpiece, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.” - Ephesians 2:10 NLT

“God loves us in spite of us”, “Our righteousness is like a filthy rag”, “We’re not worthy of God’s love”, these theological messages, among others, uttered from the lips of gospel singers, pastors, and other church leaders, did not inspire self-love. As an orphan, I was not affirmed or encouraged as a child, and so these messages made it difficult to love myself. I believed that I was not worthy, and God was always displeased with me. Instead of basking in God’s love, doctrines that taught humanity that we weren’t deserving of the love of God, created self-loathing, shame, guilt, and anxiety for always missing the mark.

In the last ten years and in this almost post-Covid world, there’s a lot of talk about self-care and self-love. It’s been a transformative journey for us who were taught that self-love is selfish. We’ve had to unpack and unlearn some things. I’ve had to unpack and unlearn doctrines that have been harmful to not only my view of self, but to many men and women of faith. My journey of self-discovery has opened my eyes to see my need for self-love. It took years of unsettling to realize that my beliefs affected my self-esteem, but when I finally had that revelation, I knew that I needed to change. I clung to Jesus’ words in the book of John that spoke of the abundant life, and I wanted that life in the here and now.

On this new faith journey, I’ve had to do some deep soul-searching and reprogramming of my mind. I decided that I would no longer expose myself to shame-based teachings. I began to really like and love who I am and continue to evolve to be. Loving myself affected my entire life in ways I could never imagine. Self-love birthed more confidence—I became less concerned about what others thought about me and focused on taking care of not only my mental health but my spiritual well-being. I’ve been on a quest to live unapologetically as a woman of faith. This quest has not been easy. There were times when I felt lost, but Holy Spirit guided me though those moments. What about you? Where are you on your journey to self-love? I encourage you to meditate on some of these thoughts and confirm them with your actions:

* I am loved by God not despite who I am, but because I am God’s good creation, the Imago Dei, the image of God.

* I speak life. I cancel all negative thinking and speak words of affirmation, recognizing that I am loved because I am worthy of love.

So, what’s self-love gotta do with it? A lot. If you don’t do what you need to do to change your mind about God’s love and your worth, then you will not be the brilliant light God designed you to be. Learning to love oneself will take some time and determination. You will have to resolve to unlearn messages that have contributed to a skewed view of your value, which affected your self-esteem. Remember, you are God’s masterpiece. There is no one like you, so value your uniqueness, and love yourself because you are the Imago Dei.

Lord God, help me to see myself the way you see me. I know I am loved because you first loved me. Help me to know that I am your masterpiece—your good creation.

~Eshe Killian

BLOG AUTHOR

Eshe (pronounced Ee-sha) Killian is a mental health and wellness advocate, speaker, ordained minister and author from Long Island, New York. Her passion for inspiring others to develop and reach their fullest potential in life, comes from her own personal journey of perseverance through life’s challenges.